Andrew Rannells and Allison Janney in “Miss You, Love You.”Supplied
Imagine that one of your closest relatives is too busy to attend a family funeral and sends an assistant, a stranger, in his place. What would they think of you in your rawest, most vulnerable state, and what would you think of them?
That actually happened to writer, director, and actor Jim Rash. When his sister’s assistant came to his father’s funeral. And since Rush has a longstanding habit of carrying his cell phone to family events and writing down what they say, it’s now the premise of his new movie, Miss You, Love You, which will be released on Crave/HBO Max on May 29th.
Diane (Allison Janney), a former New York art curator, is trying to bury her second husband in New Mexico, who emigrated after being diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. An imposing, prickly presence, she never made any friends there. She particularly despises her closest neighbor, Judith (Bonnie Hunt), a converting Christian who adorns herself in turquoise.
Diane also has a complicated relationship with her adult son, Tyler, from her first marriage. Tyler is a gay (his sexuality is a major plot point), high-flying foreign correspondent based in Los Angeles. She loves him, but at the same time resents him because he pushes her away. Still, he knows when to fire off a “I miss you, I love you” message to win her back. With the funeral in a week, and it’s unclear when Tyler will return from a mission, he sends his assistant Jamie (Andrew Rannells) in his place.
At first, Diane punches Jamie out of anger she secretly felt towards Tyler, but she is both righteous and terrifying. Meanwhile, Jamie hasn’t been completely transparent about his relationship with Tyler. But as the week progresses, each character learns that by asking the right questions, which even strangers can sometimes do, they are able to first open up and then admit their own feelings and flaws. The storytelling is heavily influenced by thresholds, with Rush delicately positioning both characters on the line between clinging to old wounds and resentment. Because who would we be without them? What if the only thing holding up the car was rust? – and move on from them. It’s sad, funny, unexpected, and beautifully observed.
Rush originally envisioned the project as a play, but it could easily have been a play. He said there’s a lot of him in Jamie and a lot of his mother in Diane. (Jamie’s car in the film was actually Rush’s car, collecting real dust on a road trip from Los Angeles to the Albuquerque location.) The actors spent a month memorizing the line-packed script, then shot it in long takes (often 15 minutes at a time) in just 17 days.
Hunt is a talented but chronically underutilized actor who makes the most of his few scenes. But the movie is almost like a pair of arms for Johnny and Rannells, both of whom have built their careers as valuable supporting players. Janney won the Best Supporting Actress Oscar for “I, Tonya,” and has also starred in ensemble series such as “The West Wing,” “Mom,” and “The Diplomat.” Rannells brings reliable flair to recent projects such as Elsbeth, Too Much, and Big Mouth. But Diane and Jamie are unusually multifaceted and meaty characters, and each actor makes the most of it.
In Rush’s own acting career, he has typically been cast as a big talker who doesn’t realize he’s the center of the joke, in Community, Abbott Elementary School, and numerous guest roles. But as the writer and director of Downhill, The Way Way Back, and Descendants (often teaming up with Nat Faxon), he has a sensitive ear for the ways in which family members fascinate, trouble, and bewilder each other. He knows how to organically inject humor into a moment. Especially the ones where the anger often boils over: scenes that collapse into absurdity. And he knows the feeling of relief that hits us when someone makes the difficult choice between being honest and being kind.
Rush’s real theme here is unrequited love and the emotional turmoil it causes. Is it brave or foolish to try to befriend someone you miss so much when they want to maintain a platonic relationship? When your beloved child becomes an adult who doesn’t want much to do with you, do you respect them, give them space, let them come to you, and then stoically endure, yet exasperate, and pounce when they call, like a heartbroken teenager? On the other hand, do you become calm, harden your heart, or protect yourself? Or do you fight back, make demands, and risk alienating yourself further?
We cling to those stories, telling ourselves that we were right or wronged, because it feels good. Until it doesn’t. It’s evidence from Rush’s writing that we feel that both Diane and Jamie will be doing things a little differently coming away from their week together, but the changes aren’t coddled or caressed. Rest assured, Rush includes a great, understated but hilarious payoff scene between Diane and Judith that shows how Diane’s core personality remains completely intact. After all, that’s what happens when you cross a threshold. At the end of the day, you are still you. However, if you are interested, there is another way to look at it.
Editor’s note: The caption accompanying the lead photo in this article has been updated to correct the film’s title.
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