Sonder’s founders couldn’t bear to come across yet another profile on a dating app where someone boldly declared that their most controversial opinion was that they liked pineapple on pizza.
“We didn’t know through user calls or interviews or anything that people were unhappy,” co-founder Mehedi Hassan told TechCrunch. “We learned that through our own experience. We just thought, this can’t be happening.”
This view that dating apps are miserable slot machines is as unoriginal as bragging on Hinge that you were named Time magazine’s 2006 Person of the Year (we all were!). So Hassan and three friends, all in their mid-20s, set out to create a boring app.
With Sonder, the four London-based founders (Meedi Hassan, Helen Sun, Leonard Platt, and Hannah Kin) set out to create an app that was more like Pinterest or MySpace than a job application. (They cite MySpace as an inspiration, even though they were too young to use it in its prime.)
“The existing format of dating apps is all about lowering the barrier to entry and improving access, making it easier for introverts to meet more people,” co-founder Helen Sun told TechCrunch. “The intentions were very good in the beginning, but the way the app has evolved, I think it’s become so monotonous that it’s lost credibility and people are suffering from burnout.”
Sonder profiles are completely unstructured and encourage users to create things like moodboards and digital collages. People can connect through the app, but they can also participate in quirky in-person events hosted by Sonder, such as “Speed Drawing” events, “Presentation Nights” and “Performative Men Competitions” (we promise).
Sonder can be used for both platonic and romantic connections, making in-person events less intimidating. You don’t have to go into a space where everyone is wandering around.
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“We hold events regularly, because it’s nice to have our regulars come back,” Sun said. “In a way, it mimics a running club, where you have repeated opportunities to meet people, but there’s no pressure in the sense that you have to make it work the first time you meet someone.”
Running clubs have become something of a phenomenon where people meet in person. Productivity maximizers have an incentive to at least participate in training, even if they don’t make new connections. But not everyone loves running, and not everyone finds visible sweat stains the most appealing.
“I hate running,” Hassan interjects. “Not everyone is interested in a running club…Helen is interested in a book club, but she can’t afford to pay to go to one.”
Sonder isn’t the first startup to realize that people might want to meet in person. Even Tinder, the most “dating app” of all dating apps, is rolling out an in-person experience. But consumers want to try something new. In the case of dating apps, early-stage startups can actually benefit from a lack of brand awareness. Going to an IRL Tinder event seems just as appealing as going to the DMV, but trying something new feels a little more appealing.
“I think what we’re trying to bring back is the magic of bringing people together and meeting someone for the first time,” Sun said. “It should be special, not like swiping through a job application on LinkedIn.”
Existing dating apps are also introducing flashy new features, like Bumble’s AI-powered dating assistant and a tool Tinder is testing that analyzes the photos in your camera roll to get to know you better.
Sonder is not negative about AI. Hassan’s day job is product engineering for Granola, a London-based AI note-taking app. The company recently raised $125 million at a valuation of $1.5 billion. But he understands that Sonder’s users (about 6,500 in London, acquired without paid marketing) tend to be less enthusiastic about using overly intrusive AI in their dating lives.
However, Sonder still uses AI. It’s just less flashy than mainstream apps. The app suggests matches to the user by running LLM to analyze screenshots of user profiles and determining who the user would like to meet. However, Hassan says he refuses to introduce any AI profile generation tools.
“I think at that point you lose your humanity,” he says. “So while we’re probably losing hundreds of users and there’s a lot of friction in setting up a profile, we want to make sure that it’s someone who’s actually putting in the effort to create that profile. Because I think that’s also an indicator of how much effort you’re actually interested in putting into connecting.”
Sonder hasn’t raised any funding yet, and the founders are working on the app part-time in addition to their day jobs. But Mr Hassan hopes Mr Sonder can secure funding and turn it into a full-time job while remaining based in London.
“To be honest, our lives are very tiring. We work 9 to 5 and at the end of the day we go to host this event,” he said. “But it’s really nice to actually watch the video the next day and see people smiling so much and having serious conversations.”
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